Fate other night
by OG Procupine
Summary: A look into what would have taken place in the source material had every Servant been OP as @#&%.
1. Chapter 1

Shirou Emiya watched dazedly as the two shining stars partook in a dance of death.

The man in blue was a gale of wind. You didn't follow him with your eyes, thought Shirou; you just saw the after-images. His lancework was a beautiful thing to behold. Curtains of red rose and fell in a sinusoidal wave, probing the opponent's defenses with every single tilt, drawing an intricate rendition of the aurora as it waved wildy about.

Compared to the man in blue, the man in red was a joke. He constantly backpedaled as he fought, and anyone could tell from just looking that he was trying his hardest to stay alive, not win. His swords were flimsy and brittle; the red lance kept turning them into stardust and it became a cloud that settled around the two battling men, but Shirou could still see that

Archer was losing.

There was no doubt about it, Lancer was a far stronger fighter than he was and it took all of his focus just to make sure he could keep up with the blue man's moves as they fought.

Clang. Kanshou and Bakuya were broken.

Crack. Another pair, destroyed.

What was this Lancer, he thought to himself, who is this man whose power far outclasses the Servant I remember?

The man in blue broke away from the man in the red shroud, and for the first time since the battle began he spoke:

"Yare yare. So you're an Archer, huh?"

The eyes of the accused widened imperceptibly. "What makes you think that?" he asked with a deliberately bored tone.

"Ah, you know. My Master has a knack for figuring these things out, I guess. I ain't going to question it, but geez, you must be really something to be using swords as an Archer, huh…" Cu Chulainn's visage was shadowed as he lowered his head menacingly and growled. "Use your real weapon, Archer. You're so weak that my Master has given me permission to kill you."

The white-haired man in question only scoffed. "Master, don't listen to this idiot. I still have a few cards up my sleeve."

The girl behind him, who had been silently appraising her Servant the whole battle, shook her head. "I can't do that, Archer. It's clear to me that you don't have the skills you were bragging about before, so take out your bow or I'll be forced to use a Command Seal."

He did not.

"Makin' fun of me, huh…" muttered Lancer darkly. "That's fine. You can take that passive look straight to Hell with you."

Everything changed. The atmosphere, the tension, the pressure in the air—all multiplied.

He uttered the damning word as he sank into a stance. " **Gae…** "

But then, Shirou took in a breath, and in an instant all eyes were upon his hiding place.

* * *

He was dead. Shirou had been chased all the way to the school and was killed.

There was no starlight, no spark, no sign of the battle that the spearman had waged previously. While spouting some vaguely kind words, Lancer nonchalantly drove his spear into the boy, and left him in a pool of his own blood.

It would be more appropriate to say that he had died before he was killed. If he had not witnessed the battle between two killing machines pretending to be men, he would have lived. He may have even become a Hero of Justice when he got old.

But he was dead, or so he thought until

Rin Tohsaka used one of her father's most prized gems to revive a young man she didn't even know.

Well, that was a lie. She had always watched him from afar, from her lofty position as the school idol. This was the school janitor, the infamous Doormat of Homurahara. She didn't know why she was saving his life with her father's momento, but she had done it and he was alive.

"Let's go, Archer," she said airily to her Servant. "We have a lot to talk about when we get home tonight."

He grimaced. "Yes, Rin."

They left and

Shirou woke up. He felt nauseous and weak from his ordeal. Thoughts muddled, he found a mop and cleaned up the blood before trudging his way home. His heart hurt.

* * *

The man in blue had found him again. He cut through the makeshift weapon in Shirou's hands as though he were spreading butter on toast.

The next thing he knew, he flew through the air; the man had roundhouse kicked him. And after... it was all a blur.

The tool shed. The lance. The girl who appeared out of nowhere.

Shirou Emiya stares up at his savior, the girl with the wind at her back

Who asks him that fateful question.

"-I ask of you. Are you my Master?"


	2. Chapter 2

The battle between Saber and Lancer was very different from the latter's battle with Archer.

An invisible sword, concealed by a barrier of wind. The radiant swordswoman swung air as though she was swinging nothing but, the only thing giving its corporeality away being the fact that Lancer's constant strikes were being continuously parried.

The spearman came at her from everywhere at once, darting in and out of the close range and jabbing with his weapon. The girl, however, was not affected in the slightest; every attack aimed against her was either blocked by a shining gauntlet or by her blade.

After the sixth attempt, Lancer was forced back by a kick to the shaft of his spear. His feet skid across the dirt of the area outside the tool shed, kicking up a cloud of dust behind him.

For the moment, no one moved.

"Whoa-ho," catcalled Lancer. "Now this is more like it. That's a fine sword you got there, girlie."

Saber's face remained passive. "Perhaps it is a sword, Lancer. It could just as well be an axe, a pike, or even a bow."

"Ha-ha," the man replied, laughing humorlessly. "Well, whatever. Say, do you want to call it a draw?"

She took the question as an insult, raising her sword to go on the offensive.

"No, really." The sword pauses, and Lancer continued nonchalantly as though it were never raised in the first place. "My Master is an idiot who gives unreasonable orders. Your Master is on the verge of death (thanks to yours truly). Why don't we both retreat and fight another day?"

Saber didn't even take the time to consider it. "I refuse, Lancer. You will fall here." She raised her sword and prepared her charge forward, but Lancer leaped backwards and onto the roof of the Emiya estate.

"So be it, Saber. It's too bad, then."

The Red Spear: readied. The atmosphere changed dramatically.

" **Gae…** "

There was no way it was possible. The distance that separated the two Servants was more than fifteen meters, and yet…

" **Bolg!** "

Lancer thrusted forward and pierced Saber. Saber dodged, but Gae Bolg pierced her heart. Saber blocked Gae Bolg, but Gae Bolg pierced Saber's heart.

No amount of Luck could stop the Barbed Spear that Pierces with Death, because by its very nature it reduces causality to shambles. It did not reverse the laws of cause and effect; Gae Bolg only allowed one cause and one effect. It was a miracle on the level of a streamlined Marble Phantasm: the spear was thrust, so it must hit the heart. The spear was dodged, so it must hit the heart. The spear was blocked, so it must hit the heart. The spear hit the heart, so it must hit the heart.

Range didn't matter. If the heart was there, then Lancer could pierce it, just by calling out the true name. It was an unfair ability that could rival the might of the Strongest Servant of another universe.

And yet.

Saber's heart was not pierced. It was an impossibility that flew in the face of the fact of the Noble Phantasm. This could not have happened, and when Lancer saw that her chest plate had not a single blemish, he couldn't help but cry out in surprise.

* * *

Shirou's body felt like lead. He flopped uncontrollably on his belly like a dying fish, feeling his insides twist as though they were evaporating.

It hurt. It hurt. It hurt. His mind replayed this thought as though it were a broken record. He was blinded by that pain so much that he didn't see that

Avalon had returned to Saber's side.

She didn't quite know how it had done so, but it was there, and she was clutching it in her hand. The rush of raw power was indescribable. This was the culmination of absolute defense that could even block enough power to destroy the planet, the only thing that could possible break the unyielding law of the spear that rewrote causality.

Lancer stared, wide-eyed, into the brilliant, scintillating light. "That's… you're…"

But he could say no more, because she was upon him in seconds, the wind gone from around her dazzling sword and swirling around her in the form of a majestic dragon.

And thus—

* * *

The priest grunted in distaste. "Lancer has died."

His golden compatriot only laughed. "Wasn't he your Servant, Kirei? To allow him to die so easily; you aren't human, but a devil in human form."

Kotomine Kirei smirked at that remark, amused by something about the wording.


End file.
